Boozing at V festival

This section is designed to help you have a safe, if a little drunk, time at V festival.

Firstly some basics

You’re allowed to take your own booze into the campsite but not the main arena.

No glass bottles allowed in the campsite. If you’re taking spirits etc there’s usually someone handing out plastic bottles for you to decant into at the campsite gates.

There’s bars in the arena selling beer, wine, basic spirits and alcopops to over 18’s.

Beer tokens

Inside the main arena at V festival there are no cash bars (you might find one or two but the main ones won’t take cash), instead you have to buy drinks tokens from the booths which are located next to the main bars. Last year a token cost £3.50 and was good for a draught beer, mini bottle of wine or alcopop.

Every year people bemoan the system while queuing in the sometimes long token queue but the reality is the system works pretty well as it keeps the bars themselves moving quickly. You may queue for 30 minutes for beer tokens but you should only need to do that once. You’re unlikely to queue for more than 10 minutes at the bar, even when it’s busy, if the queue looks too long, give it a few minutes and it often disappears, else head to the next bar.

Make sure you buy tokens for the whole weekend at the start, you don’t want to be queuing again later and miss bands. If you do end up buying too many tokens you can always flog them to people at the token queue later.

Smuggling booze

Because of the licensing rules (and because the festival want you to buy beer at the official bars) you’re not allowed to take alcohol into the main arena. You’ll usually be searched on entry to the arena and any booze you have on you will be confiscated. The severity of these searches will vary depending on the security person you go to and the time of day but you’ll struggle to walk through with a crate of strongbow without being stopped!

If you don’t want to pay bar prices there’s a few options for getting your own drinks in, there are of course for entertainment purposes only and shouldn’t be tried yourself

Camel bak - by far the best way we’ve found to get your drink in is by filling a camel bak with a spirit of your choice and strapping it to your back. If it’s a hot day you might need to sweat it out for a bit in a hoodie so you don’t look like the hunchback of notre damn going through the gates but it’ll be worth it once you’re in!

Hiding in plain sight – this tactic is higher risk than the camel bak and you have to keep a cool head about you! Just fill up your water bottle with vodka, gin, rum (anything clear) then walk through the gates swigging away like it’s water. Sometimes security get funny about unsealed bottles going in but if it’s busy you should be fine.

The resealed bottle – this one takes a bit more prep. You’re allowed to take sealed bottles of soft drinks into the arena so fill up a coke bottle with your jack and coke then reseal the bottle so it looks unopened. The best way to do this is to cut the lid off another new bottle with the little plastic seal still attached, put a few drops of super glue around the rim of your booze filled bottle and jam the unbroken seal on. Pretty fuckin James bond eh!

Back pocket kamikaze – only try this one with booze you don’t mind losing like a couple of cans of shit lager. Basically stick em in your back pockets and walk through! Works about 50% of the time, the other 50% you get cought and lose your cans!

Over the fence – this is some serious SAS style smuggling you’re onto now, not for novices! Scope out the arena beforehand and work out a quiet corner away from security (near the portaloo’s is often a soft spot). Send your wingman into the arena ahead of you to get in position the other side of the fence then lob over your bag of cans. Use a rucksack not carrier bags, you don’t want to be walking around with a plastic bag full of tenents super!

Help I’m underage

Obviously you’ve got to be 18 to buy booze and the bars in the arena seem to get stricter on ID each year. If you’re underage you’ll be able to ask other drunks to get your drinks for you (slipping them a beer token won’t hurt). Else just try at a load of different bars until someone serves you without bothering to card you.

Your other option is to take your own drink for the campsite and have a go at smuggling some drink into the arena!

What’s the best booze to take?

Well that really depends what you like to drink now doesn’t it. Cans of beer and cider are always popular but remember they’ll be warm. Spirits and mixers are good for later night sessions where everyones beered out. Make sure you pack plenty of mixers. If you want to be a campsite superhero take a bottle of shots (jäger, sambuca, tequila etc) and a load of plastic shot glasses and really get the party started!

How much beer do I need to take?

Probably more than you think, better to be safe than sorry and you can always sell it or swap it for favours later.

Shifting your beers to the campsite

Carrying beer from the car to your campsite is a necessary evil. Wheelbarrows, shopping trolleys and the pull along trolleys which paperboys use are popular tools to help you transport your crates (please don’t go mugging a paperboy, no we don’t know where the fuck people get these things!).

If you want to be flash you can rent a pull along trolley for about £15 and a £50 deposit. If you want to be smart buy one for yourself, use it then rent it out to other suckers!

If you’re on public transport 1 crate is probably all you’ll be able to carry with your other gear so spirits may be a better option.

Carling warm beer amnesty

At lasts years v festival Carling ran a promo where you could take in any can of warm beer to hem and trade it for a cold can of carling. Now don’t get me wrong, a cold carling is still a shit can of lager, but you’ll appreciate it after an afternoon sipping on warm tesco economy piss! Take advantage of this if they run it again this year and bring a load of the cheapest beers you can find to trade in. Oh and when you trade your beers in make sure you ask the carling staff what they do with all those old cans which people have traded, pisses them right off!!

Cheers carling, keep up the good work guys:-)

Drink driving

Don’t do it idiot. The chance of losing your licence is probably at least 10 times higher than an average Friday night due to the number of cops about with nothing else to do than bust idiots like yourself!